im so naturally funny because my life is a joke
sext: free shipping
your bra strap is showing please hide it because it is suggestive. also your boobs are producing lumps in your shirt please hide them. your butt is in the same situation please get rid of it. also your legs. your arms. your face.
I can see your feet and it’s very distracting and slightly arousing.
a small family could live off of my thighs for like 10 weeks

me on my way to steal your man
“In case of an emergency this airplane is designed with 8 exits located around you.”
i WA S LAUGHING SO HARD I COULDNT EVNE REBLOG FOR A FEW MINUTES
I’ve reblogged this way to many times.
never change kanye
never change
- white dad in any movie: but son, you're throwing away your DREAM
- white son in any movie: no dad, I'm throwing away ~yours~
im crying bc i just read an article saying that bieber literally called his manager at 3 am to say he decided that it should be spelled swaggy instead of swaggie
hey wanna hear a joke
well too bad someone on tumblr might take it seriously
i think the reason perfume commercials are so weird is because they have to advertise a smell without using smells





